Speak in English

Chotu: Mummy......aap ne mujh se jhut bola....😔


Mom: I told u....every time please speak in English....😡


Chotu : Ok Mom.....I said that u lied to me.....😖


Mom : When.....😳


Chotu : U said that.....my younger sister is an angel....😳


Mom : Yes.....she is....😊


Chotu : So why didn't she fly......when I threw her from our balcony......😥😰


Mom : Tera beda gark ho je......Kanjra......😱
Kithe sutteya kuri nu.....👿😡😦

Company growth

Boss: Where do you see the company after 3 quarters?
Employee : After 3 quarters I don't really care about company growth, I just do the nagin dance.

Thermometers

डॉक्टर ने पत्नि के मुँह में थर्मॉमीटर रख कर कुछ देर मुँह बन्द रखने को कहा,
पत्नी को खामोश देख कर पति ने पूछा :- डॉक्टर साहब ये चीज़ कितने कि आती है !

"मेरा मुहँ मत खुलवाओ

एक भारतरत्न उन बीवियों
के लियें भी
जो
300 शब्द प्रतिमिनट बोलने के बाद
कहती हैं कि.......
"
"मेरा मुहँ मत खुलवाओ

King's three queen

पति - राजा दशरथ का नाम सुना है।

पत्नी - हाँ सुना है।

पति - उनकी तीन पत्निया थी।

पत्नी - हाँ पता है।

पति - तो मैं दो शादी और कर सकता हूँ?

पत्नी - इन्द्राणी मुखर्जी का नाम सुना है।



पति - रहने दे पगली तू भी दिल पे ले लेती है।😳😜😳😜

posted from Bloggeroid

Sheena bora murder case

A to Z story of the Sheena Bora murder case:

• A & B (a couple in Guwahati) adopt C (a girl).

• When C is a teenager, she is allegedly impregnated by X (who is believed to be a close family member).

• C leaves the house and gives birth to Z (a baby girl).

• C then gets married to D.

• C & D give birth to E (a boy).

• C then divorces D and gets married to F.

• C & F give birth to G.

• After a few years, C & F get divorced.

• C then comes to Mumbai and marries H.

• Z & G then comes to Mumbai and stays with C & H.

• E stays back in Guwahati.

• H has a son I from a previous marriage with J.

• Z & I get into a relationship, which is not approved by C & H.

• C & D get together and murder Z.

• It is later alleged that X is actually A.

• It is also alleged that Z refused to part with an enormous amount of money which was parked in her offshore account by C.

• Enraged by this, C alongwith D plotted to murder Z.

Confused..? You aren’t alone, everyone else is equally or more confused. 😆😆😁
Ekta Kapoor Purchases rights of Indrani Mukherjees Biopic for Rs.1,00,00,00,000 for her new 5000 episode serial
" Kahani Konfusion Ki"..!😜😅😇

posted from Bloggeroid

Sex for $20

True Story - Sex for $ 20.

Believe it or not, it's a true story..

On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter.

In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.

During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go.

It was unlikely that at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another job.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million.

Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth over $2 million.

She explained that she had 'charged' him for sex, and these were the results of her savings and investments.

The husband was so astounded he could barely speak.

Finally he found his voice and blurted out, 'If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have had sex only with you.'

That's when she shot him..

You know, men just don't know when to keep their mouth shut, specially when drunk..!💣💣🔫🔫🔪🔪