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Thursday, 26 February 2015

Admin

एक एडमिन का दर्द

एक तो खुद के मोबाइल पे पैसा खर्च करके इन सब को जोड़ो......

फिर इन माँ के लाडलो के नखरे उठाओ.... कि कोई लेफ्ट...... ... कोई लेफ्ट होने की धमकी दे रहा है..... जैसे कि मेरे लड़के की बारात मे आए हो

.....कोई कुछ मैसेज करे तो दूसरा बन्दा पहले उसका उल्टा मतलब निकालता है ....फिर एडमिन की छाती पे मुंग दलता है कि उसे समझाओ

कभी कोई नासपीटा.... चुड़ैल की फोटू डाल के नीचे लिख देता है I  love you admin...... जैसे एडमिन न हो गये सबके फूफा हो गये

..........और तो और पेपर वालो की , अख़बार वालो की भी जय हो ...रोज के रोज यही छापते रहते है ....

एडमिन को होगी जेल!!!!!!

😟😁😁😜😜

IT Guy

Dedicated to friends working in IT industry....

Hamari shakhsiyat ka andaza tum kya likhoge galib....

Guzarte hai jo hum kabristan se to murde bhi uth ke pooch lete hai "Wo issue resolve hua kya.??" 😂

Results

EXAM me fail hone ki wajah kya hai ?
.
.
1 saal ke 365 din hote he.
..
Roz 8 ghante sone ke Yani
pure
saal ke 122 din
365-122=243
.
.
Diwali ; holi etc...aur summer
vacation gino 61 din
243-61=182 din
.
.
Usme 52 sanday.
182-52=130 din.
.
.
Festival ke 40.
Collage festival 15 din
130-55=75 din.
.
.
Khane pine nahane ke 3 ghante
ke hisab se 46 din.
75-46=29 din.
.
.
Roj ke 1 ghante dosto ke.Uske
15din.
29-15=14 din.
.
.
Ab hum 10 din to bimar bhi rahte
he.
14-10=4 din bache.
.
.
T.V dekhne ke 3 din.
4-3=1 din bacha Yaar
.
.
1 sal me 1 din hi to birthday
aata
hai
Ab birth day ke din kon padhe
yaar.....

Handling Life

Today I asked myself...

How to handle life ?
My room gave me the perfect answer...

Roof said: Aim high...
Fan Said: Be cool...
Clock said: Value time...
Calendar said: Be up to date...
Wallet said: Save now for future...
Mirror said: Observe yourself...
Wall said: Share other's load...
Window said: Expand the vision...
Floor said: Always be down to earth...

This was the real msg...
Then I looked at my bed And the bed said: Soja beta tu soja...Jyada sochna mat, Mental ho jayega...😂😜sab moh maya hai...

#kejriwal

Arvind Kejriwal has stopped wearing his old underwear because they have "VIP" written on them.

He can't wear "Rupa" because his wife will object.....

Or "Jockey" as horse riding is a rich man's pastime...

He can't wear "Macroman" since he is a common man...

And he can't go "Commando" since he has refused security...

So now he will have to cover up with mango leaves to prove that he is a true "Aam" aadmi...!!😜😩🙈

Patanjali

अब ये अफवाह कोन फैला रहा हे के अगर
कुछ कुछ होता है
फिल्म मे
शाहरूख वाला रोल
बाबा रामदेव करते तो
काजोल का नाम
अंजली की बजाय
.
.
पतंजली होता !
😂😂😂

US vs India

In USA when couples go to bed they say "Good Night My Love"
in UK "Sweet Dreams Darling"

In India .....
"Taale 🔒check kar liye Ke nahin ???" 😬

Love story

A touching love story...

WIFE:
What would you do if i died?
Would you get married again?

Husband:
No...how can I think of marrying?

Wife-
Why not?
You would need company...for good and bad moments....please get married

Husband:
...oh Shona...you are so sweet....even after death u r worrying about me...

Wife: so promise me, u will remarry if I die...

Husband:
Ok, ok, i'd get married again...just for you

Wife:
Would you live in our house with your
new Wife...?

Husband:Yes, but will never let her use your room.

Wife:Would you let her drive my car ?

Husband: no...
its yours...I will keep it as your memory...and buy new one..

Wife:Would you give her my jewelry?

Husband:
No..how can I...
it has your memories attached
I am sure she would want her own..

Wife: Would she wear my shoes..?

Husband: No, never
her size is '5', and yours is 7

Wife:
--silence-

Husband:
'Shiiit'...!!!😝:)😝:)😝:)

Dont laugh alone. Pass it on 😂😂😂

Money making from FB & WhatsApp

Kya Aap Facebook 🚻👥 aur Whats App 💬👤 Ki Madad Se Paise Kamana Chahte Hai? 💸💰

Toh Dono Uninstall Kar Do Aur  Dhande Pe Lag Jao! 👔🏃 😋😆😅

How to go from motivated and productive to depressed and wondering how good I really am after all.

happens more often than i would like to admit...

Why has Bjarne Stroustrup stopped contributing to computer science?

Very compressed Really

Main feedback from code review was that my error handling was too specific

Pure Science

Police & Wife

Four Facts